The Last Coffee
“All packed and ready to go?” Harry asked as he knocked on Draco’s bedroom door.
Draco turned around, taking a break from applying tape on one of the last cardboard boxes. He nodded his head with a soft smile, “All done. The driver will pick up these boxes by tomorrow morning, that’s alright right?”
“ Yeah, as long as that person doesn’t disturb my sleep.” Harry shrugged in a joke.
Draco shook his head with a chuckle, “Typical Harry of you.”
Harry for that brief didn’t know what else to say because he knew Draco was going to be thousand of miles apart in a matter of few hours when for the last 10 years of his life they have lived in the same place, whether it was school or this apartment.
“Last coffee before I leave?” Draco finally asked and Harry nodded.
They collected their coats and walked hand in hand to the coffee shop by the corner of the street for what was the last time.
“So, this is the last time we’re going to hold hands?” Harry finally said.
Draco sighed.
“Come on, someone had to say it and I know there’s a lot on your mind so just say whatever it is or you know you’ll regret it.” Harry said.
Draco looked at Harry for a brief moment knowing he was right.
Right after ordering their last cup of coffee’s together Draco finally opened up,
“Are you sure you don’t want to give long distance a try? We could make it work if we try.”
Harry smiled, “We could try, we could even try if you lived on the opposite ends of the planet but we know how it’s going to end. Our time zone’s are not even going to be the same, let alone we won’t have a proper communication about anything. It won’t be the same.”
Draco teared up a little because he was hoping with his whole heart that Harry might turn his thought around if even at the last moment but he was losing any kind of hope here.
Harry noticing his emotions took his hands in his own and caressed them softly.
“I know you think this is easy for me but it’s killing me inside. I have loved you for years, we’ve lived in the same apartment for 4 years, we’ve been together almost all the time, how can it possibly be easy for me to not be around you anymore? I’ve loved you all this time and I can’t tell you how much I really want to make it work but Draco I know the differences we’ll have, you’ll have a whole lot of different people there, you’ll be required there so many more times. You will need so much time to adjust into a new environment and I’ll start wondering how much efforts you’re putting in and then I will get used to it and by the time you’ll be done adjusting, I’ll have a life of my own, we won’t be able to make time for each other, we’ll have more fights than conversation- ”
“Harry, just stop,” Draco cut him off taking his hands away from Harry’s hold, “you have this whole thing planned out as if you’re going to do it. How are you so sure that this is what’s going to happen? What if it’s the opposite?”
Harry gave him a soft smile, “I don’t know half shit of how it’s going to work or what may happen or what may not. To be very honest, I think i’m wrong but- there is a 5% chance in what i’m saying is true and that is why before I lose you to distance, I want to be prepared for losing you. At least, I know I am ending it and not you because of distance,” he takes a pause and sighs, “I just don’t want to be hurt and hurt you more than I have. I don’t want to fight and give up on you-”
“and so you don’t even want to try?”
Harry shook his head, “I want to. I want to be proven wrong but I know I won’t be because one day I don’t want to be on the end where you say I don’t think this is working and have my heart shattered but knowing that it was happening all the time. You know how you always called me a saviour?”
Draco nods.
“This time the saviour wants to save himself. Sometimes that saviour has to make sacrifices and compromises so this time i’m choosing to protect myself because I don’t think I’ll ever be okay if this ends after trying. How can you get hurt when you never even tried?”
“By knowing you never even tried. You are giving up, Harry, you’ve never given up before.” A tear dropped down from the corner of his eyes and Harry wiped it away.
“I’m not giving up. I love you, I have and I always will but I’m not the same person I used to be. I have been a lot hurt in my life Draco and you know it so well, this one time, just once I want to not be hurt later.”
“So, you’re hurting me instead?” Draco sobbed.
“I’m hurting both of us really but I know I am hurting you. I know and I wish I wasn’t but this is for the better and you’ll know with time. I am so sorry for all the pain but we are meant to be hurt, now or later. Impending doom.”
“So, its a losing argument with you? You are not going to change your mind?” Draco asked.
Harry teared up and shook his head, “We’re both losing. I am losing you, I am hurting you but I know it’s for the better of both of us. I want to change my mind but I know I shouldn’t. I want to protect both of us.”
“I don’t think you’re protecting anyone.” But Harry didn’t know what else to say because he knew he wasn’t going to change his mind, he wanted to but he knew he shouldn’t.
Draco shook his head and after wiping away his tears gave a smile, “I suppose it was good while it lasted.”
“The best I’ll ever have. Only one i’ll ever have.”
“I love you.”
“I love you.”
They shared their one last cup of coffee after which Draco left for unknown amount of time. Harry didn’t know if he made the best decision or not, he always hoped he did but he never wanted Draco to live with any regret of ending things between them. Maybe they were doomed, maybe they were not. Distance breaks many hearts and they knew they’d be one of them but Harry would rather lose Draco to himself than to distance.
One last cup of coffee, that was all that mattered at the end.
I should’ve been studying but this was meant to be written..
the last?
Tagging some of y'all for a boost, don’t hesitate if you’re uncomfortable with the tag <3
@phoebe-delia @chinike @thecornerofbelu @nv-md @cissa-bee @missdrarrydawn @littlebodybigheartttt @harryandginnydeservesbetter @draco-lucious-malfoy @textrovert-01 @inflation-of-mind @dearly-devoted-dawdler @loves-to-read-fanfic
